thats was the cut-line from Sumiko's article on sunday's Life..
"......girls and boys cry about the same amount of time until they reach the age of 12. by the time they are 18, women cry on average four times more..."
"hormones....girls have 60% more prolactin then boys.."
I definitely do not remember myself as a cry baby when i was younger. hardly cry i'd say...
now i understand why!
She also touched on how crying helps lesson the internal stress one is having.. but in the real fact, it does not solve anything.
the example she gave; " going on a holiday to 'cure' a heartache"...
and there were many other stuff about crying and being sad she mentioned...
then it moved on to ways to fight it.
"key to happier life is to lower expectations..."
"reconciling with loss"
"analyse the loss @length to delay having to come terms with it"
"deny loss at length to delay having terms with it"
"deny loss and live on the past"
"find a substitute for the loss to help you forget"
(her best read advise..)
"you can accept the loss and reconcile to its reality"
"allow yourself a good cry because it is human and okay to be sad, then pick yourself up and move on.. there's no other way, really if you want to preserve you own sanity, dignity and well-being"
so crying helps?
but i really hate the feeling of having the teary emotions all over me out of no reasons, or reasons i am trying to learn and move on.
it is tiring to hold them and swollow them.
more tiring to figure out why do i have such.
i think it is funny.
funny that as much as i'd love to have a good cry,
i fear to cry.
*
i have some how learnt to remind myself to work hard with no complains nor questions.
guessed i have live-on hoping, waiting for much more in the past,
but i have realised some things just do not/will never happen to me.
i can only depend on myself and earn my wants myself.
thus, work hard and fulfill it myself.
maybe that the way my life is like.
but i am glad that for as much as my silly small wants for now..
i think i can still handle it myself.
can't wait to be able to drive and hit places i wanna be..
but maybe by then, i'll hope for more,
but till then..
1 step at a time ya.
*
i enjoyed my 2day break quite very much.
nothing extravagant;
just simple pleasures with enough laughters, smiles and warmth to live with.
i dragged myself up for Church, Swimming, Driving lesson3...
i spent it well.
home alone with wynn now as my world went to work/shopping and ofcus the LivP match..
but i feel a kind of quietness in me at this moment.. as i reflect on the topsy turvy emotions i have been having.. the many many many tired dreams i am getting..
*
met a once really close fren @ the pool.
now that we are far apart..
pinched me on my arm.
i pinched him on his belly.
we laughed @ the amount of weight we put on.
that moment is priceless.
the thumbs up he gave me when he saw me able to swim..
i remembered him and the boys trying to teach me how @ wildwildwet some time ago.
his words and nags about my bday which he wasn't part of.
my boys, my friendship, its still there ya...
* Message @ church today by Pastor Chian;
"Be Real"/ "be truthful to yourself"/ "be authentic" in your/ God's Principles..and you will find peace within.
immaturity vs insincerity. it is ok to be immature, but without a sincere heart you will never mature.
:)
it is so true. we all gotta be ourselves. truthful enough to oneself at least. it is not about asking us to so what we think is ourselves, but to be truthful towards our doings for what God wld agree to. right?
the song sang at the last part of the service just made me cry out to him.
hearing the whole congregation singing/ worshipping the lightness of my eyes becomes less of a burden.
"Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)"
Amazing grace How sweet the sound That saved a wretch like me I once was lost, but now I'm found Was blind, but now I see
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear And grace my fears relieved How precious did, that grace appear The hour I first believed
My chains are gone, I've been set free My God, my Savior has ransomed me And like a flood His mercy rains Unending love, Amazing grace
The Lord has promised good to me His word my hope secures He will my shield and portion be As long as life endures
The earth shall soon dissolve like snow The sun forbear to shine But God, Who called me here below Will be forever mine Will be forever mine You are forever mine
- i think this version of Amazing Grace is beautiful..
love the chorus. (my chains are gone.. and like a flood...)
*
i am glad tomorrow is a brand new week.
and i am heading to pretty sentosa with a bunch of lovelies :)
its like:"To accomplish great things, we must dream as well as act।" -Anatole France
and; "Learn how to be happy with what you have while you pursue all that you want।" -Jim Rohnand
i believe;"Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." -Abraham Lincolnand
its really;"Action does not always lead to happiness, but there is no happiness without action." -Benjamin Disraeli
but then again;"Love will find a way through paths where wolves fear to prey." -George Gordon Lord Byron
:)
* and what more i am @ wrk. what a kind of life i lead nowadays. did i mentioned. my co-workers and i, are having a "grow your beanSprout in 7days Contest" -_-"
If a man could be two places at one time, I'd be with you. Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way. If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die, I'd spend the end with you. And when the world was through, Then one by one the stars would all go out, Then you and I would simply fly away If a picture paints a thousand words, Then why can't I paint you? The words will never show the you I've come to know. If a face could launch a thousand ships, Then where am I to go? There's no one home but you, You're all that's left me too. And when my love for life is running dry, You come and pour yourself on me. If a man could be two places at one time, I'd be with you. Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way. If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die, I'd spend the end with you. And when the world was through, Then one by one the stars would all go out, Then you and I would simply fly away
*
the tune of this song keeps going in my mind.
i remember i used to play it again again.
there were a few short periods which i did.
once 2years back,Sept.
when a really close fren needed me.
and at each junction of my emotions.
this is 1 song; it is not exactly the words.
i just love the IFs.
the music and karen mok's voice that falls into the ears.
and occupies the mind for awhile.
..
Ifs.
if this is how it should be,
then i will face it and go thru it.
if this is how i have to go thru to find back that picture
then i will have to go thru it.
if i knew this was to come
would still end up here?
If.
there is something that can really get me out of this.
"on dog behavior. About 18 Jack Russell Terrier, a breed known for its high energy and drive, are turned in every month by owners who cannot cope with the breed"
ppl just don't do enough and blame it on the dog.
ppl just find blames and faults.
you know sometimes it applies to humans too.
you wonders if its Yourself.. or The opposite Party that has the Problem.
Or Both. (or none, or blame it on the weather. wth)
can't deny that I (we) have reached the age of feeling old.. :P
but i had a nice time.
chatting.. observing others!.. shopping alil and all :)
*
i saw this couple earlier, lazy sunday, late 20s..
simple, un-glam, sweeet looking..
the lady suddenly walked ahead and chase after the pigeons..
the guy laughed! and she turned and looked @ him,
cheekily and in all smiles :)
the lil bits and pieces inside the nest of love. smth only shared by u & him.
i smiled too :)
*
went for a nice brunch yesterday, great food, ambience, lazy saturday kind.
loved the things i saw, loved the simple and comfy environment.
saw families, couples, friends. (yes, i was ppl watching alot)
but i enjoyed it.
its the kind of laze you would like to finish off the day with the company you have with a simple movie on the couch with home cooking, some lazying on the road, shopping alil etc .
as much as i had that simple and open mind with a smile..
i secretly hoped that the company i had infront of me was someone else.
because.. i was dreamy and hopeful with mind floating around.
almost forgetting who i was with most of the time.
My unlucky day. almost fell and caused my "heart" on my sandles to "fall off" and having cuts n scratches on my legs. late for wrk. then got a phone call frm my sis, apparently the bill i paid for the credit card on sunday didn't went thru, almost fainted cus i worry i lost that few hundred.
but things started turning around, bank retrieved no transaction.. had friends cursing the pain i have. (we are weird, seeing the other angrier then we are.. we endup soothing ourselves)
" #%@#$%!!!!! " "he is a jerk from the start he let you and our family down anyway" "Indication, the heart seeks a new avenue~~: hehehehe, GET A NEW PAIR! 旧的不去，新的不来~~" Thank God for friends! My "broken Heart"
The coated w love environment; Broken Heart, Uncle's Jacket, Yh's Shoe..
My new Papparazzi Fren who Took this pic of me when i didn't notice! :P
My dajie told me to "PRAY" god forgive my childish acts.
