i had so much fun and was so occupied i suddenly felt guilty.
it was jesus's birthday. and i didn't knelt down and pray.
i just said happy birthday and asked for forgiveness that christmas eve..
i bump on this song, and it struck me.
who did i pray to when i felt sore? who did i cry to when i feel pain? who did i asked for assurance when i feared?
i prayed to him when the ferry home got chocky, and then i realised, i spent christmas without telling everyone his goodness and 'christmas isn't christmas if not for Him'..
The year is about to end, i am taking huge breathes to clear up whats needed.. and start afresh.
for God's grace, i gone thru 2009. learnt, grew, cried, smiled, blessed and loved.
but what touched me most was when she said (smth along this line)
"...b4 i met mike i never thought anyone would like me...
my foul mouth and all.. but he did.." (she was about to cry)
as much as i enjoy reading her entries and her bold behavior..
i also always felt that she is someone that lives with what she believes and fears almost none,
because what ever she have done is just being herself. how many ppl can do that, or even live with our own dignity? if i know XX i will tell her how much i am happy for her and how well deserved she is to meet love.. :)
i guess it is another story/ testimonial that there are ppl out there that loves and takes ppl for who they are, live with dignities and have the courage to do what they believe in.
love do exist huh?
:)
it was a great story to watch b4 i tug in.
gives me a smile.
de-grump me totally.
gave me alil slap too..
and let me feel that..
it is ok to be me,
and i should not fear and feel the ache for what others would ask of me..
I am starting to enjoy very much of my working experience with my colleagues.
working late with them as we all get alil cranky.. eating and saying stupid things.
being F* by boss and hear 1 of us talking back! haha.. and of course being able to sit around the table, eat and laugh after a long day of work :) al these deducting the negativity will be great!
friends are really ppl close to the heart.
they call u up early in the morn, hear your stupid voice, make u laugh, allow u to be silly,
allow u to bombard their mailbox, lets u talk rubbish, let the mind relax and float, have things to look forward to, have smiles to keep, and warmth around this chilly season.. and make you feel loved and needed.. :)
And i still know that; some things/ some ppl never change.
and will never. i know.. don't feel as much alr.. but have a split thoughts about it.
maybe everything is meant to be..
maybe it is a good thing, because i will have nth to feel otherwise for or even wished to be happy and bitter for, because thats it.
I paid bills. debts. bought&spent-unseen-necessity..
burnt a reeeeaally huge hole. left with PeaNuts.
but i can still smile because i know i am already very blessed.
and to top all that off..
i spent quite a bit on my baby earlier..
the weight of her biscuits after all that discount was good.
you should see her excitement smelling them!
Finally, this is One Thing i bought that is visually/physically seen!
I also made her a new doggy tag! a real pretty 1 tooo... (arrives in 5days)
i shall leave self rewarding till next month!!! :)
*
Speaking of why getting my baby a new doggy tag..
yep, she dropped her no. xxx tag when we went out some tym back..
& i was getting alil worried and paranoid lately as i feel that my baby is getting alil old-er.
there are things that she does that seems less active.
i guess age is catching up..
like this morn,
i rush out and had a 2nd thought that i didn't really see mybaby all morning,
i had thoughts of her running out and some1 shutting her out..
thus, i headed bk home..
i stood by the door.. called for her several times before i almost wanted to take my shoes out..
"dingx3" the sound of her bell and she slowly walks out of my parent's bedroom with the sleeepy-est doggy face u can ever get! with that i waved gdbye and headed out with a settled heart.
thus,
i am glad i am able to fix what's needed for mybaby today.
a doggy tag in case she gets lost.
top up her treats/biscuits/chewy-s..
how difficult is it to make her 1day of her 10doggy years a happy one?
