reflecting me. part1
are there times you feel really inferior of oneself?
are there times you hoped you were someone else?
is there someone you really admire and look upon?
you even hoped you could be like her, you adore her life, her beauty, her confidence her wonderful complete life!
:)
for me.
i do have someone i look @ in awe.
all the time i'd say.
but often its at different points of my life.
at this moment; (for about 1month)
i have become a Fan of this woman. (a stranger)
Please do not laugh at my childish chase of her everyday life.
i do not ofcourse chase over her.
but each time i read her blog (yes Blog chaser)
i smile i learn smth more, and hoped even more of her life.
why?
she is a career woman of a job i'd dream to have.
she is an active lady, time to time she will get be in her sports attire and do what's needed.
she is always on the standby to learn something new, a new sport, a new game, a new recipe..
she once went to a marathon with her dad.. she is a daddy's girl.
she is happily married with a man that says "thank you to the wife" even on her grumpy day making a meal ...
she lives in a pretty & humble home with her hubby and 2 furry balls.
she actually look really sweeet and pretty and quite hot too! haha.
i can go on and on..
but there is one thing i love about reading her entries.
They are so encouraging!
and she makes me really inspired..
and she is never afraid to have her lil gurl's dream... daily wants..
and she makes then happen..
(i personally feel so..)
and reading about her.. makes me reflect about myself...
inferior i may be at moments.. esp moments like these..
i always feel that i am almost not here nor there.
i am always half-half.
and i look @ others knowing they are complete-er.
1) i am neither successful in my studies nor having a real career..
to compensate : i managed to pursue my lil dream of design, with a dip in design, but i didnt score sky high either.
2) i am always constantly intrigued with a new sport, game, adventure, project..
to compensate : i am learning swimming... learnt soccer when i was younger, have a lucky side of knowing quite a few sport.. but never a master of any of them.
3) i admit i am a daddy's girl, but i am never an ideal 1 ...
4) i am not happily married, neither having a dream home or a license. Not even with a man that i am building that dream with. (but i do have a furry ball!)
5) finally, i am not hot or well-tone or pretty!
haha.
omg, i can't believe i am doing this!
but yes.
thats my kind of life and constant envy of..
but i still look forward for a complete future.
i really am.
everyday i am.
everyday i hoped to have a complete-er day, life and doing of things.
(to be continued... cause.. i am late for swimming with my annoying frens!)
posted by Cinds @ 2:44 PM
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